On Growing into Your Words

The quote below comes from the interview of MILCK (off-stage name: Connie K. Lim) on the Good Life Project podcast.

I was on tour the Ani DiFranco, and I told her: “Man, ‘Quiet,’ this song brings me into situations that make me really nervous. But I have to grow into those moments and this song is teaching me how to not keep quiet, because my instinct is I want to.”

And she {Ani DiFranco} said, “Well, you're writing yourself into existence.”

She told me that. And now I do that. and I think most writers could relate to that—or artists, in general.

We create things that we aspire towards, and then we sometimes get to become them.

- MILCK (a.k.a. Connie K. Lim)

Source: The Good Life Project podcast

I listened to this at the beginning of April 2021, and it’s knocked around the back of my mind for weeks.

It’s especially true since I’ve been talking more about grief.

Grief can be a storm, and it can be a wave. Sometimes, it can be a sneaker wave—where grief comes up on you suddenly, and you catch yourself acting strangely. At times, you might not recognize yourself.

After listening to this podcast, I’ve been tossed about by them all. That’s simply how grief goes, for everyone. I’m in it with you, with your neighbor, with everyone else we know.

So, when I talk about grief here, I want to be clear:

When you’re swamped with big feelings, sometimes all you can do is find the next right step.

Writing is always one of my steps. Often, it’s my very first step.

That said, I can write about grief with clarity—sometimes even eloquence—but I’m not actually skipping the actual pain of loss. That’s not possible.

Instead, I’m writing a path into existence. The words create a new possibility, and then I learn how to live into the words.

So, if you are also living into some words—whether mine or your own—know that I’m right there alongside you. We may be physically apart, but none of us are alone, sweet ones.

We’re simply living into the words, each in our own way.

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