We Approach Our Stories with Tenderness.

Sometimes, our language helps us approach what challenges us, and sometimes, that language accidentally intensifies the challenge.

But language is a tool. We can shape it however we like. If the language I use—or someone else uses—isn’t helping you, you can change it to suit you.

I’ve used snow overflowing on a porch as a metaphor for frozen emotion, but even that may feel heavy to you.

So, I also offer the word “touchstone.”

I only have happy memories associated with the word “touchstone.” It’s a term I first encountered through a young writer’s workshop when I was fourteen. It always felt like a word touched with magic.

With fiction, exploring touchstones would lead me to deeper into the story’s world or a character’s psyche. More recently, I started to connect the touchstone concept to emotions, but whether it’s fiction or feeling, the way I know something is a touchstone is the same.

Emotions too have a force. They can send you running, or they can draw you near. But they always contain information—and if you explore those emotions and understand what they’re trying to tell you, you can harness those feelings and use them as fuel for your transformation.